sunrise, sunrise. . .

it's 6:24 PM and i am so tired. 

i've been staying up later than usual with my ladies laughing until midnight--enjoying silly conversations and wine.  because of that, the morning seems to come so quickly.  i feel like i'm taking cat naps instead of getting real sleep.

at least i'm having fun, right? 

i made soup last night and ate it with a girlfriend i haven't seen in forever.  it was so much fun to chat and catch up--we were so close for awhile, but as times goes on, people get busy, things change, etc.  it was so great to have an evening that we could just be together, watching sappy movies and chatting about everything.

last time i wrote. . .woofta.  that was not a happy day for me.  i hate it when i get that way--so focused on anger or frustration.  it makes me feel like such an ugly person.  i know that everyone has their days. . .but that day was worse for me than i've had in a really long time.  it's interesting because now i feel better about the entire situation (both of them).  either i feel better about them or i just don't care.  there are unseen events that happen in life and sometimes you have to get mad about them.  other times, the best thing to do is let them go.  in this particular case, it took me a little time to realize that, yes, i needed to let it go.  instead of going on angry, i figured i should enjoy what i have left of my last year at augsburg and move forward.

am i good at that?  haha, no.  not all the time.  i can preach to other people about it until i'm blue in the face but until i'm in the thick of it, i don't remember what it's like to be so consumed with an issue.  these issues consumed me fully and wholly--but i'm happy to say that i'm not proud of the way it came out nor am i proud of the way i acted towards a shitty situation.  but--such is life.  learning from this and moving on will be helpful for the next sticky situation i get myself into. 

for now, life is good.  i'm smiling a lot, learning a lot, and generally in a good mood.  (when i'm not exhausted).  i found out i have a gluten intolerance so i've had to completely change my diet.  if you know me, you know i love the taco bell and mcdonalds nights.  those are out of the picture.  i'm still figuring out how to eat gluten free things and still be full and healthy.  i think some of my problem with being so tired is that i'm so hungry.  gluten is mostly in carbs. . .therefore, my energy level is sooooo down.  but, i'm figuring it out.  i'm even learning how to cook!  which is kind of hilarious and half scary. . .but i'm hoping i'll get the hang of it. 

i'm going to go try to get warm now. . .winter has officially arrived and my house is freezing.  i'm breaking out the hat and mittens inside right now.  still dreaming about laying by the pool. . .

fight the good fight,
+kaia